443 jokes found

Joke
What does a pirate pay for his corn? A buccaneer!
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Astronomers got tired watching the moon go around the earth for 24 hours. They decided to call it a day.
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My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad I had to take his bike away.
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I ate a clock yesterday. It was so time consuming.
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Two dyslexics walk into a bra.
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Milk is also the fastest liquid on earth – its pasteurized before you even see it
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Is the pool safe for diving? It deep ends.
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Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.
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My wife told me to rub the herbs on the meat for better flavor. That's sage advice.
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A man was caught stealing in a supermarket today while balanced on the shoulders of a couple of vampires. He was charged with shoplifting on two counts. 
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Ben & Jerry's really need to improve their operation. The only way to get there is down a rocky road.
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What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
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Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie.
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What is this movie about? It is about 2 hours long.
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Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrr!
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Where does Fonzie like to go for lunch? Chick-Fil-Eyyyyyyyy.
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How does a dyslexic poet write? Inverse.
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Don't tell secrets in corn fields. Too many ears around.
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What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey!
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Why did the A go to the bathroom and come out as an E? Because he had a vowel movement.
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