Why did the cowboy have a weiner dog? Somebody told him to get a long little doggy.

Me: If humans lose the ability to hear high frequency volumes as they get older, can my 4 week old son hear a dog whistle?

Doctor: No, humans can never hear that high of a frequency no matter what age they are.

Me: Trick question... dogs can't whistle.

I adopted my dog from a blacksmith. As soon as we got home he made a bolt for the door.

I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him. That's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.

What kind of dog lives in a particle accelerator? A Fermilabrador Retriever.

My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad I had to take his bike away.

What did the dog say to the two trees? Bark bark.

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it. It was a shitzu.

“My Dog has no nose.” “How does he smell?” “Awful”

what do you call a dog that can do magic tricks? a labracadabrador

At the boxing match, the dad got into the popcorn line and the line for hot dogs, but he wanted to stay out of the punchline.

It was raining cats and dogs the other day. I almost stepped in a poodle.

What did the Zen Buddist say to the hotdog vendor? Make me one with everything.